I don’t really use the word “hate” a lot, but when I do…it’s because I mean it. And one thing I truly hate is when people diss on marriage. Have you ever been with the bride-to-be or the groom-to-be and someone walks by and yells “don’t do it!” I hate that. And I hate it with a passion.
The world has created this mindset that marriage = bondage.
I recently had a friend ask me, “What’s it like being married?” and my answer: “It’s the most amazing thing ever. You get to do life every single day with your best friend.”
This of course does not mean that my marriage is perfect but it’s nowhere near what the world has made it out to be. I’ve been married 9+ years. To some, that’s nothing. To a newlywed, that’s a lot…..and today I’m reminiscing on the things that work for us and how Josh and I are literally more in love today than we were on day one.
1.) We encourage one another.
One thing Josh has always said to me is “babe, I’m on your team.” This is important to remember when other people come against you or you think your spouse did something just to spite you.
2.) We still flirt.
Josh still opens the door for me. He still carries heavy things for me. He still slaps me on the butt (and even though I sometimes pretend it annoys me, the truth is…if he didn’t slap me on the butt, I’d wonder why he didn’t…) I still put make-up on and do my hair and make sure I’m cute. I take myself back to dating when I knew Josh was coming over to my apartment so I put my “cute sweats” on and made my hair “messy cute” so it looked like I wasn’t trying… I refuse to ever get to a point in my marriage where my mentality is “well, you married me so I no longer have to impress you.”
3.) We do as much as we possibly can, together.
Josh and I do a lot but we try to do everything together. Of course he has his job and I have mine…but I’m talking about doing life together: We serve in church together. When we have errands to run, we do them together. We hang out with friends together. Everything is done together.
4.) We communicate.
There really isn’t a lot of “well, you didn’t tell me that…” in our conversations. We are always going to each other first.
5.) And the most important: Jesus.
I’m not just trying to sound spiritual here, but it’s true. Jesus is right smack dab in the middle of our marriage. When Jesus is in the middle of your marriage and you talk horrible to your spouse or you’ve messed up in your marriage, then you are quick to fix it.